Proof of life
My friends!
Happy freaking new year! This is me, beaming in post-holiday-ganza to assure you: I'm alive. 😂 In fact, I'm more me than I've felt in a while, and as we know this is always the point.
I'm basking in the spaciousness that finally (finally!) arrived in my life and in my home after we crossed the December portal. 🫠🎄🌕
The last month has felt like a threshold—a big shedding and a very welcome and spacious unfurling. From this vantage point I can see that at the end there I literally felt like a snake that had been shoved into it's old skin. It reminded me of the last couple weeks of my pregnancies when I'd be SO enormous and so uncomfortable and I'd been patient and positive for like . . . 8.5 months but then I got to this point where I was like “okay I know what happens next and I'm so fucking done done done!” Anyone else feel this!?
The kids' last week of school I was DEEP in the backend of my business—giving an honest look at the successes and the failures of the past five years—so much has worked and so much has NOT. I’m in deep discernment about things all the experts tell me I “have” to do like Instagram and podcasting, and it’s frankly been terrifying. I went quiet online so curiosity and intuition had space to breathe and help me prune what wasn’t working and plant seeds for 2026. I’m waking up my sleepy inner boss babe, because I really feel excited to run my business more intuitively in 2026.
On December 23rd I kicked six workers out of our house by 2pm and prepared for an intense week ahead. We celebrated my husband's birthday, we DID THE CHRISTMAS, we moved each kid into their new room and unpacked the playroom 😵💫. We moved ourselves into the new downstairs master and we all started using so many new toilets and fancy showers! My nervous system slowed and recalibrated. Half of us got the flu, so we cancelled Christmas Day hosting plans, and honestly I was RELIEVED for even more permission to do less of the traditional Christmas to-dos and more of what was right for our family this season. I passed back out at 9am on Christmas morning after the grand finale. It was the least “magical” Christmas of my career. I was singularly focused on birthing the “baby” and nesting in our new, upgraded 99.5% finished home. A project we have been talking about and planning for and living through for 9 months of 2025. (Literally, I was pregnant with a house. 😂)
It. is. gorgeous! And glorious! And I'm trying not to just be in my house all day decluttering and organizing and decorating, but I KNOW you know the bliss that is finally getting to nest after months of waiting in pregnancy purgatory!
Here's a sneak peek of a pretty view from the girls' new bathroom into my oldest's new room. I've been having so much fun with color. 🤩 I promise I'll share more soon when it's more done!
On December 27th, I took my very tired self down to Miami with five of my cousin sisters and exhaled a little deeper to celebrate my bestie's 40th birthday. If I had not booked this trip months before I fear I would have cancelled it. I felt guilty because it overlapped with a visit from my in-laws, and timing never feels ideal to take a trip like this, buuuut I am so grateful I did not cancel it! I had the wild loop-closing moment of driving past the exact spot on the side of the road in Miami where I crumpled onto the sidewalk hearing the news of my nephew's death one year earlier. Except this time I was in a cab full of my cousin sisters, including my nephew's mother and her new baby. I've been losing myself in Laura Lynn Jackson's new book, Guided, and in that moment, everything felt . . . connected. ✨
As a tropical water-worshipping girls girl, there is nothing in my life that sunshine, water and sisterhood cannot cure, and this trip was no exception. (On that note, this is your reminder that early-bird pricing for my Spring Equinox Wild Awakening Retreat to Tulum, Mexico ends this Friday, and you can expect all of the above!).
Here’s what nobody tells you about transformation: It takes time. It’s uncomfortable. It’s normal (not just at the turn of the year, but endlessly, like the phoenix hellooo).
You have to actively choose the discomfort of shedding over the pain of staying squeezed into something that no longer fits.
For me, that meant:
Saying no to the “perfect” Christmas moms are “supposed” to create
Trusting that the mess of transition would lead to something better
Giving myself the time and space to slow down, rest, and refocus in my life and in myself off the internet, instead of being on on on in my business.
And you know what? It was all worth it. I’m writing this from my little sanctuary room that was buried under STUFF for six months. Now it has space for me to close the door and write where no one can find me.
The relief is… indescribable.
What Are You Ready to Shed?
I see you, love. You’re probably reading this while:
Trying to be the “good girl” who keeps everyone happy while dying inside
Holding onto relationships that drain your soul because leaving feels “mean”
Staying in situations that worked for old you but suffocate current you
Convincing yourself you should be grateful or more (something) instead of trusting that you’ve outgrown this
Your inner knowing is whispering that it’s time.
The version of you that got you here? She did her job beautifully. But she’s not the one who’s going to take you where you’re meant to go.
Start in Sisterhood
If you’re feeling like a recalibration is just what the doctor ordered, I’m hosting my Spring Equinox Wild Awakening Retreat in Tulum this March.
This isn’t about adding more to your life - it’s about releasing the stories, body patterns and people that are keeping you trapped in too-tight maternity pants so you can finally breathe. 🙌
Sunshine, sisterhood, and the trauma-informed support to help you awaken your inner knowing and playful essence. Because this work? It’s not meant to be done alone.
Early bird pricing ends this Friday, and honestly? If you’re feeling called, don’t wait. Your future self wants to spread her wings!
Trust that it always gets better on the other side.
2025 was a year of uncomfortable inner growth for me. They say 2025 is the year of the horse, and I hope we'll be galloping together into 2026.
Big messy New Year/More Me Love,
Gervase
PS: Save up to $500 until THIS FRIDAY for my March 18th retreat in Mexico! This is the week to lock it into your calendar!
Join Me on Retreat in 2026
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